Lord's timing

My house was packed of relatives last night til this afternoon...My house was totally mess up..Gosh...all the kids were running up and down.Finally find a nice place..Sat outside the house.
The wind was so breeze..
Washed over my face,
gave me a refresh,
damn tired for only few hours sleeping time.
Looked at my watch.
It was 3.30pm,
wondering Joel had left to Singpore,
all the blessing and prayer will pass to him through the wind...
Asked me whether got 'she bu de'or not.
frankly,the answer is yes.
But I know that it was the Best journey to him la..
As I said,
it all Lord's timing..
all the best to him la..

Im sick....

Was [frustrated],[fragile] and [meaningless]...
What the point of we all study so hard..
get a better job,better income?
mountain of homework..
comparison among everyone,everywhere..
People said there is no comparison,
totally easier said than done..
Undeniable wherever we stand,
either in study or school leaver,
there was [unseen] stress..
Such an unseen stress that can make us could not take a deep breath in our life..
See a problem in every opportunities;see an opportunity in every problems.
Which type of people you are..
It make me confuse,
because I started defeated le..
What the purpose I live for?
Was so stupid struggle in these question again.
Maybe the medicine effect is started that make my brain could not analyse so much..

I live for there is a purpose or I live for others?
Who Am I so far?
Yet i do not know..

many time's [a little bit]

Was give me a shock when heard that Derek met an ancident.It make me really deep thought about our life was really short...

Do not know what will happen on next seconds.
Everything came seen like without notification.
A life could taken away in a twinkling of an eye.

It was really raise my awereness that I should drive more careful in my following days.
Many times there is [a little bit]
a little bit that I need to say [bye] to this world.
Really give thanks that HE above up was watching me all the time.
Like set up a protective layer to me.
Appreciate that I still stand on the ground with [foot]
With there,I should be more careful next time.

How much tears had warming up the cheeks?
How many pairs of eyes cried for them?
The [sadness],
the [darkness]days,
how many days need to wash over the sorrow.

Xueqi and Josie told me today,
sometimes,there is some sacrified to generate the awareness of [people]
but,the sacrified was bring too much impulsive that even me myself could not take it.
How about the people who are sacrified but without notification,
without [choice]

Be grateful that we always have a guardian angel who are always watching us from above.
Save us from the danger and give the peaceful to us.

100% heart???

Afternoon math tuition.Mr.Quek said that if we want done well in our math.First of all,you must pay your full heart in it and make some sacrified.It was right.We will get nothing when we were paid nothng.It sound like quite fair.In this world,nothing was gained for granted.You want success in your career,we must sacrified our time,lot publicity work.Well,as a student,we should pay full heart and attention in our study.Attend tuition class and etc.This was what we need sacrified before we achieved in our study.Revision need consistence.Last minutes work definitely would not passed with flying colour.
Had set a timetable for myself.But it seen like quite hard to follow.So,no much can said.Because I was the one not yet move forward,do not want to push myself to move forward.Whatever result gained definitely is I DESERVE it..

God make men perfect but men sinned make them imperfect.

I started to lost my faith and desire bit by bit.I did not what was going on me.But everything seen like not so important to me including serving God.It was terrible I took it as a not so important thing.Skipped my quite time even went to the church seen like not a sin to me.A verse was crossed my mind right now:God make men perfect but men sinned make them imperfect.Yes.It was me myself making me like not so holy.I started to lost my desire and fire to carry these.
Good Friday.It reminded me again that how Jesus was died for us.Why I want be a Christian?Why I accepted Lord?Did I really had a deep thought?Flash back the darkness day in my life.Yes.Lord was appear when I decided to give up.HE give me a hope.This was my second live in my life.What I had now even my life was not belong to me anymore.It all in God's hand.HE had decided what I should go thought.HE had planned everything to us and definitely he had planned what was good to us.
May I can continue grow in Him and regrow my faith.